A Jumbled Mess?

On the plus side, I spilled out a lot of words yesterday. Unfortunately, I probably won't be keeping most of them. I'm a bit hesitant to even read back what I wrote. 

The problem began with the realization that I was moving the story along too fast. True, it's a novella, but it's not supposed to be a speed skating competition. I've received critical feedback in the past that the ending to one of my stories seemed rushed. It was. I just have a bias against "filler" ~ words for words' sake. My career path might have gone smoother had I not started out writing novels. Novels are not my niche, I learned too late. Subsequently, I rebelled against artificial padding. Do you know how difficult it was to reach that magic 80,000-word goal post in order to have a chance with an agent? (Not that I had a chance anyway.) It was self-sabotage. My decent plot disappeared under an endless parade of words.

So yesterday I set about filling in my story's missing pieces. I don't enjoy inventing new scenes to smush between ones I've already written. I am a linear writer. Cutting and pasting messes with my thought train. It's like saying, "We'll return to our story after these brief messages."

Nevertheless, it had to be done or my novella would suddenly become a short story. But was I now falling into the same trap of word vomit? The big missing piece was my main character's romantic relationship. I had hinted at it, but a hint is very distant. I had to allow the reader to watch it develop. But boy, talk about taking the long way to get there! 

I know I'm going to have to banish some of yesterday's words. Either cut 'em or make them better. Trouble is, it's not my favorite part of the story. The relationship only exists to set up the conflict, the ultimate showdown, if you will. The "action", which is far more interesting.

Four long hours of writing with nothing much to brag about. 

The other thing that struck me with this story is that my main character is awfully mute. She's certainly no orator. The dialogue mostly consists of the other person talking and her short interjections. Is she an imbecile? But I see no opening for her to deliver any long speeches. She's doing a lot of reacting. In fact, I even wrote a line in which she admits to herself that she's a reactor, not an initiator. I do think, though, that when the roof collapses (literally), she'll show that she's not a passive observer. (Oops, did I give something away?)

I haven't experienced so much difficulty writing a story since my novel days. That nags at me. If I can't write it seamlessly, does it even deserve to be written? I keep coming back to "bad premise". I'm gonna count on my next story being better and simply try to flesh this one out as best I can. They can't all be gems. Hopefully, though, they can all be fairly interesting.

Day off ahead. I really think I need one.