A sense of humor about one's foibles is invaluable. I have nine published books (soon to be ten, I hope!) and while most of them have sold miserably, there's only one that I would probably need to be waterboarded to admit to authoring.
I even hate its cover! And I generally like my covers!
Whether it's reviews or the book itself, time definitely heals many wounds.
My second novel took at least a year to write; maybe longer. I've either lost track or blocked it from my mind. I was seeped in it. I had a good plot and all I needed to do was flesh it out. Writing about the MC's past and how it affected her present fascinated me. Delving into her boss's insecurities about women made for a nice subplot. I wrote thousands of words about those two subjects alone. Never a planner, I let the story float where it may. I checked my word count periodically to gauge how many more words I'd need to write in order to hit the magic number.
Composing a decent query wasn't easy. Queries are tricky. I tried a few different iterations before settling on one. I conducted days, weeks, of research into the best literary agents ~ created a spreadsheet with contact info, the agents' requirements and likes, added pertinent notes, and of course a column for each response. Thoroughness and attention to detail are key.
I was astonished when the rejections started rolling in. Nobody even read my sample pages! Did they? After about a hundred rejections, I moved on to independent publishers. One of them told me my writing was "lovely". She requested the full manuscript! At last someone appreciated my talent! A couple of months later she delivered her verdict. "I found myself skimming" is one comment I remember. And "Your main character is unlikable." That was really mean! It hurt my feelings so much that I swore off writing.
Looking back on that novel now, I readily admit that she was right. In fact, she was being gentle. I'm picturing her having to slog through it and I feel bad for her.
But I got over my hurt feelings. I eventually began writing again, and I became....no, I didn't become better; not immediately. I improved in little ways, though ~ story structure, writing scenes that matter. No more back story! At least only a sprinkle here and there. No more focusing on side characters who don't matter.
And today? I think about that novel and laugh. Yes, I'm also embarrassed, but who's around to make fun of me? That agent forgot me the second she sent her rejection. I am pretty sure no one bought the self-published novel ~ maybe one person at the most, which means I lost a potential fan, but I got over that, too. The book's no longer out there making me look like a fool.
It took some time, but time works wonders. So whether your rejections are driving you to depression or a bad review makes you want to punch that person's lights out, you'll get over it.
And your writing will get better.
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