Intrusive People

 

My first author website was hosted by a commercial provider. I didn't know I could host my own on Blogger for free (and turn it into an actual website instead of a blog). I was so excited the first time I logged into my account and saw that little asterisk that indicated I had received a comment. 

See, one of the things that sets my author site apart from others is that I include a page of self-publishing tips. I think I'd visited someone's (non-writing) website and noticed they'd included lots of tips and I thought it was a brilliant idea. I've certainly been through the wringer, starting as an ignorant hick who knew nothing ~ nothing ~ about publishing, but I eventually learned a lot, mostly through trial and error. And I thought, why not share that knowledge? 

So, cool.

I guess some people found it. My comment went something like this:

"I'm an instructor at a summer writing camp and one of my students found your tips, which are SO helpful. My student, Penelope, found a site that she thinks would be a good addition to your page. Do you mind adding it and giving her credit for it? It would be SO exciting for her to see her name!"

"Oh, okay. Well, thanks for finding my tips helpful. Sure, I'll add that."

That was all well and good, but then the communications kept coming ~ different student writing courses, different cities, different pupils finding helpful sites they wanted me to add and give them public credit for. Was this now my job?

Even after I migrated my site to Blogger, I occasionally received email notification of new comments. I'd get excited, thinking someone had finally connected with my writing....'til I read it. Oh, another "add" request that needed to be personalized.

My books were an afterthought ~ or more specifically a "never thought". 

I don't know if it's Catholic guilt or a disapproving mother, but I find it all but impossible to be rude to anyone. After the last correspondence, I thought of plenty of things I wanted to say, but I didn't say any of them. I wasn't exactly effusive in my response, and of course I added their recommendation. But I did add a P.S. at the end of my reply, stating that my newest novella would be released soon and pointing them to my Books page (hint hint). What I wanted to say was, "You know, I also write books."

I've now decided that when (and there's always a when) I receive more of these requests, I'm going to simply ignore them. My site is my site. Maybe you, as an instructor, might want to teach your kids how to start their own websites so they can post any damn thing they want.

The things is, I wouldn't have been offended if any of these folks had mentioned they'd bought one of my books and enjoyed it, but they treated me like their cleaning woman. Mop that floor!

I may be atypical, but I would never think to contact a website owner and demand they add a new feature and give me credit for it. "And, oh, by the way, I'm not actually going to buy any of your products. Thanks! Bye bye!"

Such is my professional online existence.